Dear Tim Tebow…

Dear Tim Tebow,

I’m writing this not because I think you’ll ever read it, but because I’m finally starting to convince myself that I’m a writer – and sometimes the only way I process things well is to get them out on paper.  Or a screen, of course.  This blog is a little outlet that helps me record thoughts and reflections so that they are hopefully preserved to look back on for years to come.  And I have had some thoughts rolling around in my head over the last few days regarding you that I’d like to remember.

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Last weekend, I took my kids to watch you play baseball here in our area.  I knew it would be a little crazy because the news of you coming to town had been in the media, but I wasn’t fully prepared for what we would find there at that game.  There’s been a lot of talk lately of “Tebow haters” and the question keeps being asked of what there is about you to dislike.  I’m sure there sadly are plenty of those people out there, but what I saw at this game wasn’t haters.  It was thousands of crazed people obsessed with the idea of being close to a celebrity.   I realized I haven’t been anywhere near too many true celebrities, and it honestly made me a bit sad for what they have to go through every single day.

We got there pretty early because my boys have grown to really admire you, and have even been blessed with some shirts and hats representing your name that they love to wear proudly.  They thought maybe, just maybe, they might get to say “hi” to you.  But we definitely weren’t early enough.  The front of the stadium was filled with people just waiting to see if you would come near them and sign something of theirs before the game began.  Most had Gators memorabilia.  A few Broncos.  Not much Mets at all.  People love to relive their glory days, for sure.

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We waited for a long time as more and more people pushed their way in to the crowd, as finally some of your team members began to run on to the field.  Then, at long last, you ran out to join them.  And the crowd erupted with cheers.  I wondered what your team mates thought about that.  I wondered what you thought about that.  I wondered if it made you cringe inside that no one was cheering for anyone on your team but you.   Baseball’s a team sport, and I’m well aware that you have always been defined by your humility.

But you definitely have also learned how to ignore the fans and focus on your warm up, keeping your attention where it should be.  You managed to make time for a few autographs after warm ups before running to take your place in line right as the first notes of the national anthem began, reminding even all those annoyed people who didn’t get an autograph of what’s truly important.  And it was from that point on that night that I became even more inspired by you.

When I purchased our seats a few weeks back, I let my son pick them, and he had wanted to sit by first base that night.  That means we were away from all the crazy fans in the section near the guest team’s dugout.  It also meant that we got to watch you from across the field as you made your way on and off the field, and as you interacted with your team in the dugout.  We got to see you give “high fives” to awaiting kids in the stands every single time you ran on and off the field.  We got to see you kneel down at the end of the dugout to greet the teen boy sitting on the other side of the wall.  And of course, we got to see you run out to stand on the field with the beautiful young lady with cerebral palsy, who asked for you before she sang “God Bless America” to the crowd in the seventh inning stretch.

And at the end of the game, I had received what I call a very clear lesson in intentionality.  That choice to make every moment that you’re given on the field count not only to do your very best as an athlete, but as a conduit to spread God’s love to people around you.  Not because you are trying to make a name for yourself or gain status among all those fair-weather fans, but because you know without a doubt Whose you are and Who you’ve chosen to live for.

I’ve never played baseball before but I love to watch it, and left field doesn’t look like all that exciting of a position to me.  Not too many balls came your way, but you had to spend a lot of time just standing there waiting, just in case one did.  But the time in between innings – in your conversations and high fives and smiles with fans –  showed that this journey of yours is about way more than baseball.   And now I see more clearly what you wrote about in your book I read not all that long ago, on how you can survive life’s letdowns and challenges.  Because football and baseball careers don’t last forever for even the best of players.  But relationships, both with Christ and others, do.

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Plumb has a song with a line in it that I love – “We do not exist for us, but to share Your grace and love…” Truer words have never been spoken, when it comes right down to it.  So… thank you for showing me a living example of that as I watched you play this past weekend.

Thank you, with your local games going on at the same time as these terrible race riots around our country, for reminding all of us that love always wins.

Thank you, for giving me the opportunity to remind my kids that we can survive any season in life when we live for more than just that season, but for eternity.

Thank you, for giving my rising young men, one of them with his dream of higher level sports someday, the powerful message through your actions, not words, that their love for God and for others will always be way more important in the end than any career successes.

Thank you, for leaving me with the challenge that’s still in my head long after the last ball of the game was thrown and I left the “adoring” fans – to live every moment of every day with a Kingdom mindset and purposeful intentionality.    No regrets.

christydsiggy2013

 

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Never enough…

I get asked this one question all the time… How do you do it all?  Working three part-time jobs… homeschooling my kids a couple days a week… trying to care for a house that seems to always have some issue that needs fixing (that I usually don’t know how to fix)… trying to be physically and emotionally healthy myself… and most importantly – making sure my kids are well taken care of, nurtured, and loved.  And I’m not going to lie.  It’s a lot.  It was never God’s original design for this to be a one parent job, and it sure runs more smoothly and beautifully with two loving parents working together as a team.  But then sin entered the world, of course, and with it, sickness and death – and here I am.  Flying solo.  And most days, in all honesty, “flying” is way too lively of a word.  (Who came up with that phrase anyway?) Maybe “walking”, perhaps?  Or even “plodding”?

But the truth is, I don’t do it all.  I state that with emphasis all the time when asked, and I’m saying it here and now to anyone and everyone out in cyberspace who might care to stumble across this blog post.   Because, quite honestly, there is no earthly way I could do it all.  I am just one person, and as I tell my kids at times, I’m not an octopus and I can’t be omnipresent.  I only have two arms and two legs, and I can only juggle so much.

That’s why this time of the year gets pretty rough.  School starts up and the kids’ fall schedules come in, and every year as they get older, it gets more challenging trying to figure out how to get them all where they need to go.   It truly takes a village.  I’ve had a few overwhelming days this week where I’ve tried to figure it all out, and in the end, I just decided not to think about it yet.  I told the kids that these are their unique passions and giftings that God has placed on their hearts, and if they want to keep pursuing them, they need to pray, along with me, that the Lord will provide the resources.  He knows them best, and He is also well aware that He created me with the inability to be in more than one place at a time.

The phrase “You are enough” is quite the current trendy statement right now, and is so often said in a well-meaning way as an encouragement to mamas out there.   But the truth is, when we all stop and think about what this really means, none of us are ever truly enough.  And no one should know that better than you mamas out there who juggle many hats on any given day.   Instead, the beautiful, life saving truth of the Gospel changes our understanding that we will never ever be enough on our own – but Jesus always will be.

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Brooke McGlothlin’s new book Gospel Centered Mom drove that truth home for me recently more than any other book I’ve read in a while.  This whole concept of doing enough and being enough is so easy to get sucked into due to our addiction to social media, where it’s easy to compare our lives with others and try to measure up to everyone else we follow.   We fall prey to what McGlothlin calls the “ME Gospel,” where God exists for us instead of Him, and Bible verses are even taken out of context so that we can apply them to our earthly happiness rather than His eternal holiness.   We want our children to obey because we care more about what their obedience says about us than we do about discipling their hearts.

As Gospel centered moms, we have to step back from that ever-increasing mindset, and remind ourselves of the truth.

-I will never ever be enough, no matter how hard I try.  But God is always enough in my desperate lack.  (Philippians 4:19)

-I don’t need to act like I have everything together, because God’s strength is made perfect in my weakness.  (2 Corinthians 12:9)

-Humility pushes me out of the way, even when I don’t want it to, and allows me to do what’s best for someone else instead. (Philippians 2:3)

-God may not give me everything I want, but if I delight myself in Him, He will change my desires to match His desires. (Psalm 37:4)

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There is nothing that has made me see my weakness and frailty more than trying to parent these precious children on my own.  It constantly brings me to my knees, and honestly, often to tears.  But God, in His tender loving care for me, sweeps me up and strengthens me for the tasks the lie ahead, helping me all the while to remember that it is HIM doing all this, and not me.  Sometimes I can’t even explain how, but He always makes a way for us.  These are His kids, and He is writing His story.  He will continue to work His plan in their lives, and in mine, in spite of our mess and my frequent inability to trust Him fully.  And as I choose to arm myself with truth from His Word each day instead of spending time scrolling social media, I remember that motherhood is not about perfection, but about pursuit.

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If you need these same reminders, I would highly recommend picking up a copy of Gospel Centered Mom.   This book brings home this powerful message that every mom needs to be reminded of and offers practical ways to live it out every day of this motherhood journey…

You are not enough.  But that’s ok.  Because He always is.  

christydsiggy2013

 

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